Guiding good talk, good touch & good vibes—without alcohol.
At Dry Vibes Philly (2024), intimacy & relationship coach Candace Johnson—creator of the TOUCHY/FEELY intimacy card game —sat down with Cheldin Barlatt Rumer, CEO & Executive Producer of THIS IS IT NETWORK™, for a candid conversation on building intimacy in alcohol‑free spaces. This blog distills the best insights, scripts, and take‑home rituals so you can practice sober intimacy tonight.
Watch the 30 minute Sober Intimacy talk
Why sober intimacy?
Presence beats performance. When the social default isn’t a drink, we tend to notice more, listen better, and set kinder boundaries. That’s not just “self‑control”—it’s nervous‑system awareness and consent working together.
Key benefits:
- Clearer communication (less blur, more truth)
- Emotional safety (opt‑out without guilt)
- Self‑confidence & self‑assertiveness (say what you need, kindly)
- Better memory & repair (remember what you promised; follow through)
TOUCHY/FEELY: the sober‑friendly framework
TOUCHY/FEELY intimacy card game pairs talk prompts with opt‑in touch prompts and built‑in safety:
- Comfort Check‑In: “How ready do I feel?”
- Levels: Start light; go deeper only if everyone’s ready.
- Builds self-esteem: Find confidence in the comfort of sharing
- Vibe maker: Let the chemistry unfold based on the pleasure of talking + touching
Why it works: sober‑curious or fully sober, you get structure that keeps vibes warm and boundaries clear—without the therapy vibes.
Date‑night, friends’ night, or group facilitation
- Date‑night: Begin talk‑only, then add one opt‑in touch card later.
- Friends’ night: Keep it playful; rotate partners for variety.
- Facilitators/coaches: Open with the Comfort Check‑In, state pass rules, and model concise answers.
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